


Star Crossed Lovers

by McRaider



Category: Something Rotten! - Kirkpatrick/Kirkpatrick/O'Farrell
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bea loves her boys, Brian D'arcy James as Nick Bottom, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, I have to write all the fics for this tiny fandom myself, Nick is a mess, Nick is not okay, Nightmares, No Incest, doting Nigel, no beta - we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-10
Updated: 2020-06-10
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:14:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24638146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/McRaider/pseuds/McRaider
Summary: Nigel knows he’s generally viewed as the weaker of the Bottom brothers. He’s the soft, more sensitive, quiet one who has always needed Nick. What he doesn’t realize, what they don’t realize is just how bad Nick really does need them.
Relationships: Bea Bottom/Nick Bottom, Nigel Bottom/Portia Brooks
Comments: 1
Kudos: 12





	Star Crossed Lovers

**Author's Note:**

> Okay I’m super late to the Something Rotten ball game, as such there is not much in the way of fan fiction and I can acknowledge I may not get very man reads or comments, which is fine. Honestly, I need there to be more fan fiction so I decided to write my own. So while I’m definitely writing this more for myself than anyone else, I’m posting it in case there are others out there like me who see this show as vastly underrated. PS I have something like eight fics I'm already planning to write or am writing. Stay tuned.

Nicholas Bottom wasn't the type of man to openly voice his fears and anxieties – it simply wasn’t who he was, from the age of fourteen he’d been forced to be stronger, braver, and work harder to ensure his little brother had whatever he needed to survive, thrive and grow. Yes, it had meant that the older brother’s concerns, fears, and issues remained, for the most part, unattended to, but that’s just how Nick had assumed life went.

So, he’d built up the walls, the walls of snarky, frequently grumpy responses to keep the anxiety he felt hidden away in the darkness away from those he loved most. He became focused on providing everything to those who relied on him, Bea and Nigel, and shutting out the rest of the world. As long as he had Bea and Nigel, Nick knew he could survive anything. Unfortunately, building walls to shut out the rest of the world often meant he still managed to shut out the two people he loved most. It was his default setting now.

The harder he pushed to make things “perfect” for his family, while still lightening his own burden, the harder his family pushed back on his unsteady and crumbling walls. Until finally Nick was faced with the very thing that scared him most in the world: losing his brother and wife. Even though things had, for the most part, ended well after their hearing with the magistrate, and even though they would still be together, the cracks in Nick’s foundation had begun growing larger with each passing day.

Nigel had grown accustomed to his brother’s habits, and as such, he’d grown to assume he was the weaker of the two Bottom brothers. He was more sensitive than Nick, he had anxieties and panic attacks. Nigel had never seen his brother suffer from those issues. Nigel’s rather childish understanding of himself and his brother’s emotional stability was cracked for the first time as he watched his brother become more and more agitated with the Shakespeare issue, followed by the Portia situation and the musical. It was the first time Nigel could recall his brother actively and openly lying to him and Bea, the first time he and his brother really got into it.

Perhaps it was to be expected, Nigel wondered, no one could be strong forever, right? But even after they’d been banished rather than beheaded, even after they’d excitedly packed up their whole lives and took off for a town on the English Channel called Brighton. Together with their odd little family of six, including Shylock and Nostradamus had managed to get a covered wagon, thanks to Shylock’s more fruitful ability to save money. Bea and Portia typically rode in the back with all their belongings, while the men walked. It took just over three days to arrive in the town. In those three days, Nigel watched his previously stoic older brother change even more than he’d already been changing.

Nick had apologized to them, painfully admitting his fear of failure, and Nigel had, incorrectly it appeared, assumed that their lives would go on as normal once the forgiveness was provided and they’d hugged. His brother who had been somewhat panicked to get everything together and make sure they would be safe for travel wasn’t excited like the rest of their traveling party. He’d become quiet, withdrawn, and relatively straight-faced.

Nigel watched as dark circles grew under his brother’s eyes, his posture becoming more defeated in the strong and tall man he’d once known. The younger brother was naturally concerned, when his brother hadn’t become more lively the first day or two, but his worry turned into fear as three days turned into the week and then into another as Nick went from unusually quiet to nearly silent and even more irritable than Nigel could ever remember.

Bea and Portia seemed to understand something was bothering Nick, it was clear Bea, who was now starting to look pregnant, was doing her best not to be bothered by her husband’s continued silence and crankiness. It was the even more protective side of Nick, however, that left Bea at her wit’s end and finally pulled Nigel aside.

“You have got to talk to him,” she insisted, her hand on her pregnant belly. “He’s driving me crazy, he asks me how I’m feeling every few minutes now. He gets upset over every little movement I make.”

Nigel had figured this would actually be something better for Bea to ask about, but it became clear that Nick wasn’t likely to open up to either of the women as he withdrew further from them, only talking to ensure they were physically safe and healthy. It was nearly two months since they’d left London and were boarding the ship in a matter of days for the new world. They were renting a little home just off the docks until their ship arrived. It had two rooms for once, Portia, Bea, Nick, and Nigel all shared one room, Nigel and Nick sleeping on the floor while the girls got the bed. Shylock and Tom were in the other room. They’d all lain down for the night, Nigel faking sleep while he listened to see what his brother did since it was becoming clear sleeping wasn’t on the list anymore.

The first thing Nigel noticed was how long after they’d all come to bed, his brother actually laid down on the floor beside him. When Nigel finally heard Nick lay down on the mattress beside Nigel’s it was well after both women had fallen asleep. The younger brother lay on his side, turned away from Nick, listening for his breath to even out.

At first, he heard a little rustling, as though Nick was trying to find a comfortable position to lie in, as though there was an ideal position to be comfortable on the ground. Still, he heard his older brother heave a mighty sigh before finally, his movement ceased.

Nigel felt his own nerves starting to peak when he finally heard his brother’s breathing even out to something resembling slumber. Rolling over on his side as quietly as he could, Nigel studied his sleeping brother. He was lying on his back, but he certainly didn’t seem at peace, every so often Nick would jerk slightly and make a noise.

Nigel wasn’t sure, but he must’ve fallen asleep himself at some point, because the next thing he woke up to was small whines, before he heard a sharp intake of air and something around him shifted. Nigel barely cracked his eyes open, so as not to alert Nick that his brother was also awake.

His eyes landed on his brother who was now sitting upright on his small mattress, his chest heaving, his face glistened slightly in the light of the moon coming through the window. Nigel could just barely see his brother’s eyes, but they looked terrified, almost haunted. Before Nigel could pull himself up and address whatever was bothering his big brother, the man bolted to his feet and a second later was out the door. Nigel’s eyes widened this time as he slowly stood, ensuring to remain quiet, he made his way to the door where he was surprised to hear the sound of vomiting outside.

Fear laced the younger man’s dark brown eyes, was his brother ill? Could he have the plague? Nigel immediately shook his head; his brother wouldn't risk Bea or their child’s wellbeing if he thought he could get someone else sick.

Nigel reached out to pull the door open when he heard another noise, a noise he hadn’t ever heard from his brother. It sounded like someone had torn a violent sob from his brother’s throat, choking him in the street. As Nigel peaked through the door he saw his brother, leaning against the house, away from his sick, sinking slowly to his knees, his face distorted in something akin to absolute agony.

Nigel’s brows furrowed in confusion, he finally pulled the door open and stepped outside. Almost instantly he saw his brother wipe his face and mouth, turning his head away from Nigel’s approaching form. All of Nigel’s life, his brother had been a constant safe figure in his life, protecting him, cuddling, and occasionally coddling him from the rest of the world. Nigel couldn’t think of a single time in his life when his brother’s presence hadn’t made him feel safer, happier, and more at peace.

With that in mind, Nigel hoped maybe Nick would allow him to do the same in return, as he made his way to his brother and sat at his side. Sitting this close in what was now rapidly approaching dawn, Nigel took a moment to really study his brother, he was shaking, but Nigel didn’t think it was from the chill of the night. The man’s whole body was trembling, from his hands which were desperately trying to find something to do, all the way down to his legs that were currently resting on the ground.

Nigel had to admit he was confused, why wouldn’t his brother want someone to comfort him? He'd clearly been struggling with whatever this was for a while now, yet he hadn't sought anyone. Why suffer alone? Reaching out, Nigel let his hand come to rest on his brother’s lean shoulder and was surprised at how much thinner it seemed to be now than it had been a month ago. He felt the muscles under his hand stiffen and briefly Nigel was sure Nick would pull away from him. But then he heard it again, the same noise that sounded like an animal whining in pain, it was ripped from his brother’s unwilling and clenched lips because a second after the noise came, Nick’s hand shot up and gripped Nigel’s in return, hard. Nigel was a bit shocked at how hard his brother was gripping his hand, but rather than being reassured that his brother was finally reaching out, it only worried him more.

Nigel scooted a little closer, letting their knees and hips touch from their seated positions, he pulled his hand away from his brother’s vice-like grip, his heart aching when he heard an odd whimper. Reaching towards the back of his brother’s neck and head, he gently pulled the man towards him. Almost instantly two things happened, first Nick’s desperate attempt to remain strong in front of his brother melted away, along with Nick’s entire shaky stance as he all but collapsed against Nigel’s chest. The second thing that happened, was unsettling, his brother started crying, no, that wasn’t the right word, what Nick was currently doing in almost painful silence as he tried desperately to pull himself back under control was nothing short of terrifying. Giant tears, one after another slid down his cheeks to dampen Nick’s shirt and shoulder, the trembling was turning into a full-on shake, and it seemed like any control Nick had over this reaction was completely and utterly gone.

Nigel did the only thing he could think of; he wrapped his other arm around his brother’s shoulders and held on tight. He lowered his face into Nick’s sweat-soaked curls, as he felt every sob wrack his big brother’s body as Nick choked and coughed with each new wave of whatever it was torturing the older brother.

Nigel was vaguely aware of the door opening again and heard a small gasp. Before he felt, rather than saw, Bea joining them on the ground, her arms wrapping around ‘her boys’. He soon heard her gentle nonsensical noises as she caressed the back of her husband’s head, the other hand gripping Nick’s where he was clutching at the back of his brother’s shirt.

Bea’s eyes met Nigel’s, the younger brother could see the worry and fear in the woman’s kind and loving eyes, as she pressed soft loving kisses to the back of her weeping husband’s head. Nigel wasn’t sure how long they sat there, a protective barrier around Nick. But it felt like the storm in Nick’s heart raged for hours, as the moon disappeared and the sun slowly started creeping up over the horizon, coating the sky in the beginnings of light pinks and reds.

At some point, Nigel noticed Bea had her own tears slowly sliding down her cheeks. He wondered if she was as worried as him, or if she saw this as a good thing. After what seemed like an eternity, Nigel felt his brother take in a painfully shaky breath, he didn’t pull away from either of them, but it was clear the older man was starting to compose himself.

“Oh darling, why didn’t you say anything?” Bea finally asked, so quietly Nigel almost missed it.

“I’d already failed you both once, I…I couldn’t do it again,” came the hoarse and painful whisper from his brother, who’s head was now resting comfortably against Nigel’s shoulder.

Nigel met Bea’s eyes once more; he could see something silent there as if she was encouraging him to speak. “You didn’t fail, Nick. Stumbled maybe, but you’ve never failed me.”

Nick let out another noise, that sounded like something caught between a sob and a laugh, “I almost got you beheaded, my…” he heard his brother swallow, “My beautiful, little, baby brother and I nearly got you killed, you didn’t even want to write the damn play,” his voice strangled by emotions. “I…I told you…” Nick went quiet again, trying to draw in a shaky breath, the clearly fragile hold he had on his emotions flickering briefly.

Bea gently rubbed her hand across Nick’s shoulders, “What was the dream about, baby?” she asked softly.

“You left me,” he murmured looking at Bea, then turned his haunted gray-green eyes toward Nigel, “And you…you killed yourself, you and Portia…like Star Crossed lovers,” he managed to finally speak.

Nigel remembered sitting on the bench next to Bea, he’d certainly considered not working with his brother anymore. But the thought of leaving him behind, of actually killing himself, leaving behind his brother, of not talking to, not seeing his big brother anymore was enough to make Nigel’s stomach churn. “Nick…I’m not going to kill myself. And I forgave you,” Nigel assured.

“I don’t deserve it,” his brother replied quietly.

Bea chuckled softly, kissing Nick’s temple, “Maybe, maybe not, but that’s the beauty of forgiveness, you don’t get to decide who or what is worthy of it. Sweetheart, we’re in this together, we’re always going to be in this together,” she promised gently.

“We’re not going anywhere, Nick. You never left me, I’m certainly not going to walk out on you for a mistake,” Nigel promised.

“That makes three of us,” a soft sweet voice from above them said. Three sets of eyes turned to see Portia standing there with a blanket around her shoulders, “Got room for one more?”

Nick chuckled, “Welcome to the family,” he whispered as he opened his arms, sitting up a little straighter to hug his new sister.

Nigel smiled as he held his love close, all three of his family members, he hoped that what had been torturing his brother would settle down now, so the man could go back to normal. But, even if it didn’t, Nigel made the silent promise to himself; he’d be there to help his brother, no matter what he needed.

The End


End file.
